Actively improving your communication skills is one way to become more effective in either your personal or your business life. Your small business will undoubtedly perform significantly better if you can improve your communication skills to the point where you can communicate effectively and efficiently. Are you understood by the people around you?
As the saying says: Communication makes the world go round, and improving your communication skills can make an incredible difference in how well your world operates! We perceive our world through our senses (sight, sound, feel, taste and smell), and that is also the way we communicate with others.
Although it is not always intentional or even within our awareness, when we communicate with others, all five of these senses, along with our memories and past experiences, make a contribution to the message sent and/or received. Most of us work under the assumption that it is the words that we use that count, but studies have shown that the words make up less than 10% of the message.
The other 90+% consists of the qualities of your voice (tone, timbre, pitch, volume etc), body movements, the environment in which the conversation takes place. Not to mention, past experiences with the person relaying the message, past experiences in similar circumstances or past experiences with a similar person – a lot of which is outside of your control.
Improving your communication skills requires you to be more conscious of not only what is happening in the conversation from your point of view, but also how the recipient of your message is decoding and interpreting that message.
Improve Communication Skills by Learning to Listen
What I mean by really listening is just that, while the other person is speaking, concentrate on what they are saying. Most of us tend to be racing ahead when someone else is speaking; we might be working out how we will respond, or we might even think about something else completely.
Hear them out without interrupting, wait until they are finished speaking before formulating your response, and you will be surprised how much of a difference it will make to your communication.
Improve Communication Skills by Being More Aware of the Other Person’s Body Language
You don’t need to be an expert on body language, just a bit more observant. The way a person is sitting or standing, whether they are facing you or turning away from you, can tell you a lot about how they are receiving your message.
- Is the person you are talking with looking at you?
- Do they seem distracted, or are they paying attention to what you are saying?
- Are they leaning towards you or away from you?
Seek a Common Understanding of the Message
Not sure if the other person really got what you mean? So ask them…
Just because you both use the same words does not mean that you are talking about the same thing, particularly if you do not share a similar background. And do not assume that everyone you talk to will understand the meaning of slang words, jargon or acronyms.
Not everyone will ask for the meaning of a word or acronym that they are not familiar with, which can create a barrier to effective communication. One way to ask without directly asking is to paraphrase what the other person has said and repeat it back to them to check your understanding and theirs. Just start with “If I am understanding you correctly, …”
If you get it wrong, they will tell you or clarify any points in your restatement that they think are incorrect.
Take Responsibility for the Clear Delivery of Your Message and Significantly Improve Communication Skills
If it is your message, it is your responsibility to make sure that the person you are giving the message to understands the meaning of your message. Be prepared to talk it through, expand on your thoughts and discuss the various points until you are sure that they ‘get it’.
Listen to their response, ask them to share their understanding of the message.